Carl Joseph Walker-Hoover was 11-- hardly old enough to know his sexuality and yet distraught enough to hang himself last week after school bullies repeatedly called him "gay." The Springfield, Mass., football player and Boy Scout was ruthlessly teased, despite his mother's pleas to the New Leadership Charter School to address the problem.
Sirdeaner L. Walker, 43, found Carl hanging by an extension cord on the second floor of the family's home April 6, just minutes before she was going to a meeting to confront school authorities again.
This is why it's not allowed to use such language.
This poor child hung himself from his second story bedroom with extention wire, because he was bullied and called "fag" and "gay".
And to think, his birthday was to be the same day as the International Day of Silence.
Woah... I was bullied when I was 11, probably not as much. Jesus... hanging yourself with extension cord is extreme
I wonder what was going through his mind... What did he think was going to happen when he jumped from a high place with something around his neck? He probably wasn't thinking much. Usually the surge of adrenaline is enough to stop peoples suicidal thoughts and put them into survival mode, so if he didn't die instantly from the fall then chances are he regretted it
School systems don't deal with bullying effectively... It's a simple fact that schools these days have pussy regulations. Actually, I'd go so far as to say that the way school systems deal with bullying is perverse. The teachers do nothing, the bullies parents are usually idiots, the teachers don't allow the victim to defend themselves and they don't punish the bully - Then if the victim does defend himself, at best, he receives an equal amount of blame for the fight
All you have to do is land one punch on a bully and the whole thing disappears. Even if hes way bigger than you and can kick your ass. It ruins the bullies effort\reward ratio, if you're going to start throwing punches (even if he does beat you) everytime he starts something then hes just going to give up
Sacrifice the short term consequences because it will get rid of the long term ones
Parents need to stop telling their children that violence doesn't solve anything. It doesn't when you're an adult, but if you're a little kid then violence solves everything
This is just sad cause obviously this kid couldn't stand up for himself, but no one else stood up for him either. Too many f-ing zebras out there. I hate zebras.
Rollback Post to RevisionRollBack
"A wizard is never late Frodo Baggins. Nor is he early.
He arrives precisely when he means to."
"Losers always whine about their best, winners go home and Fvck the prom queen."
What the hell? That was very extreme, to say the least. I mean, everyone was bullied as a kid. I personally got into a fight with anyone that used to bully me, so it wasn't much of a problem back then, considering the fact that I didn't have any self esteem issues. The problem really is in the school. Few address the problem as serious, and just think "it's just kids being kids". It's idiotic.
Thank you for posting this, Link. Words are a powerful force in our world - they can cause us to do weighty things. I do not remember being the victim of classic bullying while I was a child, but we all have memories of certain times when someone said something about you that still hurts. It is not always easy to just forget about it and cheer up.
What saddens me is that there are kids that do this type of bullying to begin with. I do not think a world absent from these types of comments is going to happen, but I think that the parents are partly to blame for how their children are treating others. If they provided an example to their kids of how to live with love and respect towards others, perhaps less of these types of things would occur.
I supervise a K-6 tutoring program at a Salvation Army community center. We talk about peer-to-peer abuse, and this motivates me to be even more vigilant in strongly thwarting it. I could not imagine how it would feel being the person supervising a group of children and something like this happening under my watch.
The phrase "That's so gay" has nothing to do with this linkx, you're thinking something along the lines of " kid you're so gay ", and I can definitely see when that crap is built on the child every single day it could get really tough.
(honestly I'd think it would be pretty dumb if some kid went home an tried hurting themselves because they were indifferent about their sexuality and liked the same gender an had a hiss fit cause some kid said; "ugh this class is so gay I wish it'd be over already"
Using the word gay out of context, i.e. "That's so gay" is aiming towards "That's so stupid" or the other politically incorrect term "That's so retarded", which are all wrong, but again the matter of this boy killin himself isn't because of someone using those words like that. They're were targeting him personally.
Shit like this is exactly why parents need to step up their efforts in public schools, and teach their kids right from wrong, and also teach them that they're better than those punk kids calling them names like "fag, or gay", just turn the cheek show everyone else around them that they're better than that. I know stuff isn't always so easy.
Sometimes it could help to put their child in some sort of home school program if they're struggling on a great level because of these kids ( at least until these bullies are dealt with thorougly), but still let them go enjoy the after school activities such as football, baseball, etc. Most homeschooling is still done through the district they live in so the kids are always able to join in those sort of things.
Obviously there was a big problem on the parenting side too, to lead the child to do this. There's all sorts of factors that build into these kinds of equations.
Oh and P.S. can we keep the oprah winfrey-esc posts off the forums even if it is general chat? Hell I could visit yahoo news or something stupid like that and come here with a new topic on how a kid killed themselves every damn day. It's just stupid, sure it makes for a topic to talk about but really. Are you going to go up to a RL buddy an talk about some poor kid in timbucktoo that offed themself cause they were teased in school? Probably not.
right on. teacher today are all idiots and don't want to do anything with it. and some students even attack teachers. today's regulations are terrible if there are any. all momma's boys can do whatever they want now and it sucks.
I know a lot of teachers, and none of them are idiots. Perhaps the true idiot is the one who insults a group of people without reservations yet doesn't bother to use decent spelling and grammar.
The teachers aren't at fault. The system is at fault. In today's schools if a teacher so much as taps a child's shoulder it's either battery or sexual harassment. If a teacher holds two fighting students apart they can be accused of inflicting the bruises. It's not that the teachers are "idiots", it's that there are legal ramifications if they interfere with the students.
I fear for my wife who is finishing up her Early Childhood Education degree.
EDIT: I also agree with everything Freak_of_Nature said, with the exception of his P.S. The general board exists for discussion of all topics, regardless of whether or not they have winfrey-esque themes.
Oh and P.S. can we keep the oprah winfrey-esc posts off the forums even if it is general chat? Hell I could visit yahoo news or something stupid like that and come here with a new topic on how a kid killed themselves every damn day. It's just stupid, sure it makes for a topic to talk about but really. Are you going to go up to a RL buddy an talk about some poor kid in timbucktoo that offed themself cause they were teased in school? Probably not.
I would just like to say I for one am glad he posted this, because it has reminded me to keep closer watch on the children I am responsible for.
I know a lot of teachers, and none of them are idiots. Perhaps the true idiot is the one who insults a group of people without reservations yet doesn't bother to use decent spelling and grammar.
Maybe english isn't his primary language....
Quote from "Number1SuperGuy" »
IThe system is at fault. In today's schools if a teacher so much as taps a child's shoulder it's either battery or sexual harassment. If a teacher holds two fighting students apart they can be accused of inflicting the bruises.
I fear for my wife who is finishing up her Early Childhood Education degree.
That's the sad truth...It's a shame really.
I fear for her as well. Especially if she's teaching in the Baltimore area....scary stuff.
Rollback Post to RevisionRollBack
"A wizard is never late Frodo Baggins. Nor is he early.
He arrives precisely when he means to."
"Losers always whine about their best, winners go home and Fvck the prom queen."
People that stand around and watch this crap unfold. People that see the kid getting ridiculed and do nothing to help him.
Indeed, and when children go and try to get help, and they just stand there like deer in the headlights....
Ugh...
Quote from "Genesis" »
All you have to do is land one punch on a bully and the whole thing disappears. Even if hes way bigger than you and can kick your ass. It ruins the bullies effort\reward ratio, if you're going to start throwing punches (even if he does beat you) everytime he starts something then hes just going to give up
Sacrifice the short term consequences because it will get rid of the long term ones
Parents need to stop telling their children that violence doesn't solve anything. It doesn't when you're an adult, but if you're a little kid then violence solves everything
Many bullies are stronger and don't care if it get's physical though. I myself didn't get bullied too often, but it wasn't unusual to overhear something going on in the next row of lockers...
Quote from "Freak_of_Nature" »
The phrase "That's so gay" has nothing to do with this linkx, you're thinking something along the lines of " kid you're so gay ", and I can definitely see when that crap is built on the child every single day it could get really tough.
I used the same name as ABCNews. If you would kindly read the article, the child overhearing "that's so gay" did not kill the child, it was the fact that he was bullied. Relentlessly. And the teachers and school administration would do nothing about it.
What's worse, the child hung himself on the day his mother was going to go talk to them for the umpteenth time.
Quote from "Number1SuperGuy" »
I know a lot of teachers, and none of them are idiots. Perhaps the true idiot is the one who insults a group of people without reservations yet doesn't bother to use decent spelling and grammar.
The teachers aren't at fault. The system is at fault. In today's schools if a teacher so much as taps a child's shoulder it's either battery or sexual harassment. If a teacher holds two fighting students apart they can be accused of inflicting the bruises. It's not that the teachers are "idiots", it's that there are legal ramifications if they interfere with the students.
If the teacher's cannot do something, then bring in people who can do something to stop bullying.
From what I've seen, the teacher's are just as much to blame as the administration (Administration referring to the Principal and such.).
Yes, there are good teachers out there. But there are more bad teachers. And more bad administrations as well.
i know this isnt the right way to go about things... but all through school now adays we are babied and raised in a very very soft environment... when i was in school we would bring it outside and fight... i think that that is honestly a much better situation than trying to talk shit out... fuck talking... that never helped me... only way to get point across was to hit a motherfucker in the face...
I don't believe this incident means we shouldn't be allowed to say words like "gay" anymore. PC doesn't solve shit. Besides, he may have been straight. Sexual orientations are not stable at age 11.
This incident means there are assholes out there (given bullies) who come from somewhere, there are also the indifferent ones who let this happen, and there is also the mentally weak one (sorry) who killed himself for a reason that's not feasible.
It's cool to go say the bullies are assholes but that's not relevant. It's a grand problem, it will not go away. The kids in the society, regardless of whether they are gay or w/e need to understand certain things about society and be able to fight it. I was beaten since about age 7 and the idea of killing myself never came up, I had an understanding that those attacking me were idiots and losers who would later have miserable lives and who have problems of their own which make them bullies. Nobody could stop this as well because nobody cares, and that's life, it's not something that can be solved by laws. This is what each parent needs to teach their kid. It's doable. It may not be very well understood by the child but it gives him/her protection. MENTAL protection.
This is what the BSA needs to teach their Scouts, as well. But I guess they're too engulfed in their anti-gay pro-God rubbish and can't even give a kid feasible self-esteem.
Btw, these issues can be solved mentally but they require an extremely mentally strong kid (they do exist). Given that those kids are so rare, physical conditioning, at any age or group, in my opinion, is required for successful and happy functioning in society, but is not enough (this is where the violence doesn't/does solve everything thing comes in).
The teachers may not have the power to physically do anything but they could have sent the other kids to the principal, could have given them detention, lots of different ways to handle it.
I know I got detention for a lot less in some cases.
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ABCNews.com
This is why it's not allowed to use such language.
This poor child hung himself from his second story bedroom with extention wire, because he was bullied and called "fag" and "gay".
And to think, his birthday was to be the same day as the International Day of Silence.
Edit: Added link to full story.
I wonder what was going through his mind... What did he think was going to happen when he jumped from a high place with something around his neck? He probably wasn't thinking much. Usually the surge of adrenaline is enough to stop peoples suicidal thoughts and put them into survival mode, so if he didn't die instantly from the fall then chances are he regretted it
School systems don't deal with bullying effectively... It's a simple fact that schools these days have pussy regulations. Actually, I'd go so far as to say that the way school systems deal with bullying is perverse. The teachers do nothing, the bullies parents are usually idiots, the teachers don't allow the victim to defend themselves and they don't punish the bully - Then if the victim does defend himself, at best, he receives an equal amount of blame for the fight
And people try to sweap this kind of thing under the rug...
It's a sad world...
(Also, added link to full story on opening post. But it's 3 pages, so it may be a bit of a read.)
It's about the bullying, etc...
Personally, I never had to suffer that. But kill yourself because of that sounds a bit stupid to me.
Then imagine going to teachers, parents, school administration, anyone, and nobody doing anything, saying boys will be boys.
How would you feel?
This is how so many kids have to grow up in.
Sacrifice the short term consequences because it will get rid of the long term ones
Parents need to stop telling their children that violence doesn't solve anything. It doesn't when you're an adult, but if you're a little kid then violence solves everything
"Losers always whine about their best, winners go home and Fvck the prom queen."
"Losers always whine about their best, winners go home and Fvck the prom queen."
Rise and rise again, until lambs become lions
What saddens me is that there are kids that do this type of bullying to begin with. I do not think a world absent from these types of comments is going to happen, but I think that the parents are partly to blame for how their children are treating others. If they provided an example to their kids of how to live with love and respect towards others, perhaps less of these types of things would occur.
I supervise a K-6 tutoring program at a Salvation Army community center. We talk about peer-to-peer abuse, and this motivates me to be even more vigilant in strongly thwarting it. I could not imagine how it would feel being the person supervising a group of children and something like this happening under my watch.
(honestly I'd think it would be pretty dumb if some kid went home an tried hurting themselves because they were indifferent about their sexuality and liked the same gender an had a hiss fit cause some kid said; "ugh this class is so gay I wish it'd be over already"
Using the word gay out of context, i.e. "That's so gay" is aiming towards "That's so stupid" or the other politically incorrect term "That's so retarded", which are all wrong, but again the matter of this boy killin himself isn't because of someone using those words like that. They're were targeting him personally.
Shit like this is exactly why parents need to step up their efforts in public schools, and teach their kids right from wrong, and also teach them that they're better than those punk kids calling them names like "fag, or gay", just turn the cheek show everyone else around them that they're better than that. I know stuff isn't always so easy.
Sometimes it could help to put their child in some sort of home school program if they're struggling on a great level because of these kids ( at least until these bullies are dealt with thorougly), but still let them go enjoy the after school activities such as football, baseball, etc. Most homeschooling is still done through the district they live in so the kids are always able to join in those sort of things.
Obviously there was a big problem on the parenting side too, to lead the child to do this. There's all sorts of factors that build into these kinds of equations.
Oh and P.S. can we keep the oprah winfrey-esc posts off the forums even if it is general chat? Hell I could visit yahoo news or something stupid like that and come here with a new topic on how a kid killed themselves every damn day. It's just stupid, sure it makes for a topic to talk about but really. Are you going to go up to a RL buddy an talk about some poor kid in timbucktoo that offed themself cause they were teased in school? Probably not.
The teachers aren't at fault. The system is at fault. In today's schools if a teacher so much as taps a child's shoulder it's either battery or sexual harassment. If a teacher holds two fighting students apart they can be accused of inflicting the bruises. It's not that the teachers are "idiots", it's that there are legal ramifications if they interfere with the students.
I fear for my wife who is finishing up her Early Childhood Education degree.
EDIT: I also agree with everything Freak_of_Nature said, with the exception of his P.S. The general board exists for discussion of all topics, regardless of whether or not they have winfrey-esque themes.
I would just like to say I for one am glad he posted this, because it has reminded me to keep closer watch on the children I am responsible for.
Thanks, Link!
Maybe english isn't his primary language....
That's the sad truth...It's a shame really.
I fear for her as well. Especially if she's teaching in the Baltimore area....scary stuff.
"Losers always whine about their best, winners go home and Fvck the prom queen."
Indeed, and when children go and try to get help, and they just stand there like deer in the headlights....
Ugh...
Many bullies are stronger and don't care if it get's physical though. I myself didn't get bullied too often, but it wasn't unusual to overhear something going on in the next row of lockers...
I used the same name as ABCNews. If you would kindly read the article, the child overhearing "that's so gay" did not kill the child, it was the fact that he was bullied. Relentlessly. And the teachers and school administration would do nothing about it.
What's worse, the child hung himself on the day his mother was going to go talk to them for the umpteenth time.
If the teacher's cannot do something, then bring in people who can do something to stop bullying.
From what I've seen, the teacher's are just as much to blame as the administration (Administration referring to the Principal and such.).
Yes, there are good teachers out there. But there are more bad teachers. And more bad administrations as well.
gamma11 > east
This incident means there are assholes out there (given bullies) who come from somewhere, there are also the indifferent ones who let this happen, and there is also the mentally weak one (sorry) who killed himself for a reason that's not feasible.
It's cool to go say the bullies are assholes but that's not relevant. It's a grand problem, it will not go away. The kids in the society, regardless of whether they are gay or w/e need to understand certain things about society and be able to fight it. I was beaten since about age 7 and the idea of killing myself never came up, I had an understanding that those attacking me were idiots and losers who would later have miserable lives and who have problems of their own which make them bullies. Nobody could stop this as well because nobody cares, and that's life, it's not something that can be solved by laws. This is what each parent needs to teach their kid. It's doable. It may not be very well understood by the child but it gives him/her protection. MENTAL protection.
This is what the BSA needs to teach their Scouts, as well. But I guess they're too engulfed in their anti-gay pro-God rubbish and can't even give a kid feasible self-esteem.
Btw, these issues can be solved mentally but they require an extremely mentally strong kid (they do exist). Given that those kids are so rare, physical conditioning, at any age or group, in my opinion, is required for successful and happy functioning in society, but is not enough (this is where the violence doesn't/does solve everything thing comes in).
I know I got detention for a lot less in some cases.